“Are soulmates a reality, or a torture device?” – Carrie, Sex and the City

after reading this post I couldn’t help but wonder…why are young women so obsessed with finding “The One”? or is it really the culture we live in that’s projecting this obsession on to us? whatever happened to finding Mr. Fun-For-Right-Now?

Nearly 6.8 billion men and women roam the earth, and I’m really supposed to believe that there’s only one I’d want to spend the rest of my life with? Talk about pressure! If that’s the case, I better get moving, because that’s a lot of ground to cover. – Smitten

while I agree with most people when “The One” is brought up as this fairy tale concept, an utterly romantic notion that is so full of hope and promise that your heart comes through your eyes like a crazed cartoon character cruisin’ for a kiss. I get it. especially when it’s 2 a.m. and you’re watching Sleeping Beauty for the second time in a row…  :ahem: but when the lights are on and you’re waking up in a double bed consisting of only you and your cat, does that automatically mean that the only other person meant for you is waking up in a double bed of their very own with a different cat crosstown? seems so silly. and unrealistic. not to mention unhealthy.

I’m not going to act elitist and say that I haven’t ever believed in finding “The One” because I’ve been there. I dreamed of finding “The One” when I was still obsessed with She-Ra and riding my Cabbage Patch Big Wheels. I’ve been in that place thinking “this is it” with two different men. and I’m not even 30 yet. but let me ask you this: because I’ve had two great loves does that automatically mean my love life is over? am I totally broken and wasting my time on the next guy who really isn’t “The One”? have I used up my quota in love?

this is why I think we have several soulmates. strength in numbers. soulmates aren’t strictly romantic. soulmates are the loves you always want to be around. someone you have a deep connection with. a natural affinity for. friends who hold your hair, tissues, and heart. grandparents you call to boast of your new successes. siblings you treat like children of your own. I believe soulmates come in various forms – and not just because it makes me feel better about this fantasy concept, but because it’s true. I’ve been lucky enough to have many soulmates of both platonic and romantic circumstance in my life. and I’m sure I’ll have many, many more.  and I know Carrie Bradshaw would surely back me up on that.


Photo thanks to wikimedia